New England Captain – Thoughts

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Stuart Pearce will apparently be announcing a new England captain for tomorrow’s friendly with Holland, so here are some thoughts about the runners and riders…

Steven Gerrard

Meh. An obvious choice, but question marks over his fitness and durability have to be relevant here. Also, at almost thirty-two, is this really the right person to be leading a so-called new generation?

It’s a maybe, and while his experience in the role is undeniably a plus, he’s tainted – probably unfairly – with the stain of underachievement from the Sven/Schteve/Fabio regimes.

Wayne Rooney

If you’d asked me a couple of years ago, I would’ve put my house on Rooney being a viable candidate for the captaincy – not so much now. Obviously he’s a volatile, and while you can argue that may be a product of his passion, he falls on the wrong side of the reckless/determined line.

Plus, of course, regardless of it not really being their decision, the FA would probably like it if the captain of England wasn’t such a polarising figure. And didn’t sleep with ‘mature’ prostitutes.

Scott Parker

The right personality, the right public image, and the acceptable face of English football. Is there a contemporary player who better fits the grinding, grafting image of our national team?

Two problems though…

Firstly, like Gerrard, he’s the wrong side of thirty and won’t be able to wear the armband for more than a season or two at most, and secondly, are his footballing abilities really good enough to ensure continued selection?

At the moment, the answer to that is a definite ‘yes’, but that has to be a concern going forward.

Ashley Cole

What a horrible thought. Forget his 93 caps, it’s just not feasible to have the most unpopular player in the country as national team captain.

He manages to combine all the worst elements of all the candidates; unpopular, polarising, old, and belonging to a failed generation. The moment he leads England out, you’ll hear the sound of thousands of Englishman searching family trees for alternative heritage.

Joe Hart

Ticks every box, aside from the one that precludes his appointment in the eyes of many.

Goalkeepers shouldn’t be captains.

Whether that’s an archaic view or not, it seems to be a consensus. It’s a shame though, because Hart actually has all the qualities that you’d want; clean off the field life, strong personality, and guaranteed selection for many years ahead.

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